Everything old is new again…including my material.

I’ve came to a realization earlier today. That was: “Wait….I have a BLOG?????”  yep, I had all but forgotten (again) that I have this outlet for conversation, creativity, and bacon-related topicality.  I will admit that I had fallen into a trap that everything I say must be in 140 characters or less…but then it hit me. I’m a long-winded freak. So, here we are once again. On the precipice of random thought and expression. Those roads…should sometimes stay parallel, and never…ever, cross. If I wanted to share the inspiration that lead me here today. It’s pretty simple. Throwback. Freaking. Thursday. Yes, just trying to be somewhat creative for Throwback Thursday brought me to a review of photos that I had taken and shared over the years…and after a Lougle search of my name (I prefer to believe the events of “Hot Tub Time Machine” actually happened) , I stumbled on some very cute pictures of the Junior Ballances.

This is how I will always think of my kids.

I had included this image to a blog post from 2008, where I shared the events of a random day with my family in Birmingham, Alabama. The full post, can be found right…………..here. Notice the easy, breezy way that I tell the story of my youngest, and a not-so-obvious mustard gas attack. I have to get back into that groove. So if, you will indulge me, I will once again share the absurdity that is my thought process in blog form.

Dammit….I said BLOG form, not POG FORM!

It’s good to be back, America. #tbt


Kids…and what to do with them.

This week, I am fortunate enough to have my family with me in Alabama. After only one day, it has already been quite an adventure…mostly because of my 7-year-old, Allyn.

It started when I brought them in for a tour of my office, where she noticed that we were in the middle of an infestation of ladybugs. Yes, ladybugs.The cutest bug in the world to a 7 year old.


She immediately noticed that most of the ladybugs had gone to heaven, and that the remaining ladybugs needed to be saved. She proceeded to pick up as many ladybugs as she could, which prompted me to find a container for her use in capturing the ladybugs to be released in the wild.

After she had collected the 9 survivors, we continued our tour and stopped in on one of my fellow Program Directors, Jimbo Wood of 105.5 the Vulcan. Before I could formally introduce him to anyone, my little chatterbox was off and running, explaining in GREAT detail the plight of the ladybugs… Jimbo, to his credit, hung on her every word.  We then exited and released the ladybugs into the bushes outside the building.

At that point, it was time for lunch. I suggested a place that I knew the kids would enjoy and would empower them to make their own choices…Mongolian Barbecue.

The calm before the storm...

We had some fun with my Blackberry taking pictures, but even though they ate quite a bit, Allyn was a bit squirelly. She asked to sit on the same side of the her older sister and I were on. Normally, we say no to this, but I was in a good mood, and gave the okay. She then took a spot in the center of the booth.

After a few minutes, she began to get a bit nutty and loud, and after she announced loudly that she had “farted”, I leaned in close and asked if she “knew where she was”, implying that she was in a restaurant and needed to stop. She thought about the question for a second, and replied:

“In the middle?”

I stopped cold…and just started laughing. “In the middle”…

Brenda crying

My wife, God bless her, tried to keep a straight face, however that was also impossible, as evidenced by her reaction. Just priceless.

Allyn is a handful, but she is also one of a kind, and the only 7-year-old vegetarian I know (you heard me).

My kid…I think i’ll keep her.